Apple may not be as clever as it thinks it is.

It’s possible – let’s face it nobody’s

that smart.

God had most of the best ideas but not

all of them;

He didn’t think of Apple zed, for a start.

That’s a sizeable oversight when you think

about it,

Press two keys and undo your latest blunder.

God’s not one for kicking himself

but honestly,

Is he regretting taking Sunday off, I wonder?

I mean, there’s even a reset button on

my boiler,

Even on a crappy PC you can hit ‘undo’,

If you’re in the business of creating a

flawed species,

They’re gonna screw up, you have to

think it through.

Every time I said something stupid and

got in trouble,

When the glass smashed, each time I tripped

and fell,

An Apple zed would have saved my

unworthy bacon,

Might still have the Lotus, still be married

to Michelle.

I mean, God didn’t even have a rival species

to deal with,

Not like Apple, he didn’t have to improve on

Amstrad or Sinclair,

Maybe it was complacency, but it can’t have

been easy,

Maybe the stress of it got to him ­–­ I mean,

look at his hair!

Then again, God didn’t get greedy, so cut

him some slack.

He didn’t supply man with a cable way

too short,

He didn’t make Mankind 10.0 without

a phone jack,

And the iPad was indeed pointless, as God

originally thought.

Apple may not be as clever as it tells us it is.

I hate its smugness, but the thing that

really sucks

Is that it’s hard to stay loyal to a God who,

however munificent,

Didn’t think of Apple zed, and didn’t go on

to make a gazillion bucks.